ANONYMOUS

When I was a senior in high school, I was so excited to get my UGA acceptance email with the notorious virtual-fireworks. UGA was a new and exciting place for me as I was so excited to get out of my Charlotte, NC bubble, meet new people, and experience independence for the first time. For me, Greek life was always a sure thing: my mom was greek, my older friends were greek, my friends sisters were greek, and in general, I had been sold on the idea of greek life being quintessential to the southern college experience. Within days of my acceptance, I was getting texts and follow requests from girls I knew and girls I had mutual friends already in greek chapters at UGA. Little did I know at the time, this was dirty rushing. I made several visits to Athens my senior year of high school, stayed with sorority girls that I knew, and began a long countdown of the days until I could experience it for myself. 
I went into the rush process optimistic; this was a new beginning, I felt like there was little not to like about me, and knew everything was going to be just fine. As the week went on, however, I was becoming more and more beaten down as house after house was dropping me from its list and while I still had the one house I thought I was supposed to be in, it was hard not to wonder why I simply wasn’t wanted anywhere else. By the end of the week I had been dropped from all houses. My expectations were shattered, my sense of self-worth was crushed, and to say I was devastated was an understatement. In an attempt to pull me out of my misery, my mom threatened to cut off my allowance unless I went to an information meeting on a new chapter that was colonizing that year. I begrudgingly went with the idea that new sorority stigma would be worse than not being in a sorority at all. To my surprise, I was shocked at the turnout of girls there who shared similar recruitment stories. We all joined, and to this day we problematically call ourselves “the merry band of rejects” (this started as a serious name and has now come to be something we laugh about). I grew to love my sorority and love the friends I made and the experiences that I had. But to love something means to have a strong desire to make it better and accept the fact that some things might never change and abandonment might be the next best option. Greek life is incredibly problematic and I hope to use my insider perspective to shed light on some of the most pressing issues within the system. 
For weeks on end following my recruitment experience I found myself making lists in my head of the things that were wrong with me that resulted in being rejected from every house. For a moment I thought it was because my roommate didn’t get along with someone in the chapter and I was guilty by association. At other times I thought it was because my hair was really frizzy during the most important round because it was pouring down rain. At one point I had concluded that it was due to a large pimple I had after starting hormonal birth control in the weeks before arriving on campus. I tried to remember every little thing I did wrong to anyone I knew growing up, wondering if I should have been nicer to someone or wondering if I should have studied harder for a certain test. I didn’t know why I was rejected, I still don’t know why I was rejected, and I probably never will. The girls who “dirty rushed” me have produced their own reasons, citing computer/technology issues, simple mistakes, and things “not being in their power.” It is no longer important to me than I know, but the emotional toll that recruitment took on my mental health was drastic. From similar discussion, I know that I was not and will not continue to be the only person who has had or will have similar experiences. When you are deemed “not good enough” for a particular group, it forces unfair comparisons and self critiques that can be incredibly harmful. 
The recruitment process fuels harmful stereotypes on both sides of the process, not just for girls trying to join a chapter. To begin, most every sorority chapter on campus has a guidebook for daily outfits during rush week, what to wear and what not to wear. This is ableist. Not everyone might be able to walk in the required 6in wedge heel or feel comfortable in a tight shirt or mini skirt. This is racist. Not everyone’s skin tone matches the pale nude pump required for preference round. This is classist. Not everyone can afford to purchase a new outfit to meet the strict requirements. The look requirements are a lot to ask as well considering the “top girls” of the chapter are the ones at the forefront of the process and more often than not, a solid number of the members are sent to the backroom which is, “just as important.” It is easy to tell who the “top girls” of certain chapters are by looking at their chapter’s Instagram feed. The feeling of “not good enough” doesn’t just go away once you’ve joined a house. 
Elitism runs throughout the entire Panhellenic system, in particular through legacy status. This means that girls whose mothers, grandmothers, sisters, or other relatives who were members of other chapters receive priority status in the recruitment process for their chapters. Sororities are expensive and they always have been, which makes the selection process unfair for non-legacies who come from lower socioeconomic statuses. The fact that sororities are so expensive is elitist within itself, and is evidenced by the overwhelming majority of upper class white women who join Panhellenic chapters. Sorority dues at UGA specifically, usually go towards the upkeep of the mansions and social events such as date parties, fraternity socials, and a bit philanthropy events (more money is raised at events for philanthropy specifically). Many of the houses were formerly owned by rich, white, businessmen throughout the city. 
In the year 2020 we have seen a massive rise in civil rights activism after the murders of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, and so many more in this year alone. The activism goes so far beyond the immediate violence towards Black citizens by the police and white supremacists. Racism, discrimination, and inequities are being brought to light in so many different aspects of life: the workplace, our education system, our healthcare system, the housing industry, the sports industry, and so many more. One huge movement that has come out of the events of 2020 is “Abolish Greek Life.” The movement has called to attention the alarming number of wealthy white members reaping the benefits of Greek life that others aren’t afforded. It has highlighted the racist tendencies of legacy status and racist histories of many Panhellenic chapters, the racism in the sorority girl stereotype that enforces a white ideal, and so much more. Many chapters in an effort to combat attacks have taken performative measures. My chapter created a “diversity chair” to make sure we are more inclusive and understanding towards everyone in the chapter. They have yet to take action. Many chapters, mine included, took to Instagram to post “diverse” members of their organizations. Strictly performative. 
I am weary to discount my experience in Greek life because overall, it was a very positive experience for me personally. I was able to obtain leadership positions, make very dear friends, and have a lot of fun. The negative aspects of my experience on the other hand, in my opinion, has made me tough as nails and allowed me to think critically of my own position in this system. I think it is important that we look at the things we love critically when there is obvious harm and wrongdoing on its behalf. The long histories and stereotypes that are so harmful, however, make Greek life what it is. I would love to come up with solutions on how to make it much less problematic, but that would require a complete breakdown and reboot of the system.